Honesty

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"

"Of course. What may I do for you?"

"Well, I bought an expensive! Electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?"

"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."

"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her. The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"

"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare."

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"

"I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."

Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father - - Next!"

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Poems Written By Husband To Wife

I wrote your name on sand it got washed.



I wrote your name in air, it was blown away. Then



I wrote your name on my heart & I got Heart Attack.



******



God saw me hungry, he created pizza .



He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi .



He saw me in dark, he created light .



He saw me without problems, he created YOU.



******



Twinkle Twinkle little star



You should know what you are



And once you know what you are



Mental hospital is not so far.



******



The rain makes all things beautiful.



The grass and flowers too.



If rain makes all things beautiful



Why doesn't it rain on you?



******



Roses are red, Violets are blue



Monkeys like u should be kept in zoo.



Don't feel so angry you will find me there too



Not in cage but laughing at you.



******

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Men's Logic

A man and his wife were in a court for their divorce case.

The Problem was who should get custody of the child.

The wife screamed and jumped up and said: "Your Honor. I brought The child into the world with all the pain and labor.

The child Should be in my custody."

The judge turned to the husband and said: "What do you have to Say in your defense?"

The man sat for a while contemplating. ..then slowly rose. "Your Honor... If I put a dollar in a Pepsi Vending Machine and a Pepsi Comes out...

Whose Pepsi is it... The machine's or mine?"